Race take away: I have no gas pedal, I have no go. This is not starting at square one, this feels really off.
Rob and I didn’t have great sleep the night before the race, too many people out late partying and making noise that kept us up. 4am came early and we got ourselves ready without rushing. One thing that was off, my stomach. I wasn’t in pain, but just suffice it to say that I think stress and business is taking its toll again. I resign myself to the likelihood that I will have to make a stop along the course, based on other past races.
It was in the 70s and humid, but at least the start of the race was 6:30am and it was expected to be cooler than the record 100 degree temps that we’ve had lately. Rob and I walked just over a mile to the race start and chilled in our corral. Before we knew it we were off. Rob was swallowed up in the crowd and gone before we even got to .25 mile. I took lots of water at every water stop because I felt thirsty already. I knew I was in for a long day when by mile 2 I just didn’t feel it. I wasn’t in pain or anything like that. My legs were dead heavy either. I was just not there. I had no gas pedal, no go, in no way race ready. I had set a realistic goal. I wasn’t trying to break my PR of 1:35, I was trying to improve upon my 1:51 hilly course half marathon in June that was the race where I knew I had an injury and got Graston’s treatments. Surely recovered from my injury, on a flat Chicago race course I can at least do better than my 1:51. Something in the 1:40s would make me feel like I’m whittling away at progress on getting race ready again.
Alas, every mile was just a slow and painful reminder of how out of shape I am. I had to mentally just call it a workout to keep any momentum. I mentally had to focus on each mile than getting into that meditative happy state that I’m used to. I actually can’t remember feeling like this other than when I’m frought with stomach issues and just wishing for the race to be over.
I would tell myself things like “the last 2 miles will feel so good, when we are running back to the finish”. 2 miles on the way back and it was not the case. I never felt a spring in my step. I just existed through it.
I’m tired of hearing myself talking about something being wrong at each race lately. What is most troublesome is my stomach held together for the race (not long after though), I am recovered from my injury, so there is no reason to feel this miserable and out of shape.
I was hoping for small progress to see I’m on the right path again. I am not a patient person so it’s hard to manage through a bad run when I want to build back my fitness. I have to buck up and just keep moving forward. Hopefully the contiued training and racing will eventually bring about some of the old good feelings again. I’m considering setting some running milestone goals that work from where I am today. Hopefully having milestones will help me focus on smaller goals for a while.
Rob had a strong race of 1:36 and I’m so proud of him balancing work, the basement project and still fitting in workouts to keep his fitness intact.